Recounting your infertility stories can actually help you cope with things because working through infertility can feel like a terribly lonely journey. It’s easy to tell who isn’t struggling with infertility – from the tricycle left on the front lawn to the ‘baby on board’ sticker in the back window – the proof is all there. When a couple doesn’t have kids, unless you are on familiar terms with them, you may never know if it’s by choice or not. Before the days of the World Wide Web you would have to look for a support group to hear other couples’ infertility stories, which could be quite a problem for couples who live in rural areas. Furthermore, infertility was seen as socially unacceptable and even shameful. Due to the increased availability of the Internet you can now have both a cyber support group and a real life support group, and you’ll be able to find out just how common childlessness is.

Infertility stories of every shape and size are quite easy to find on the World Wide Web. You may read stories about couples who have a long last had a child after lots of miscarriages, couples who have had IVF or alternative fertility treatments, couples who have chosen to use a donated egg, sperm, or womb, couples who have given birth to twins (or more) because of fertility treatments and couples who have chosen to adopt. You will definitely find a story at least a little bit similar to your situation! My favorite one was about a woman who had premature menopause but was able to have a baby because her identical twin gave her an ovary! It’s the perfect match! Identical DNA means the eggs are basically the same as what she had anyway, and it also means that her body wouldn’t reject the ovary! I know that it can mean a risk of earlier menopause for the donating twin, but if I recall correctly, she had already had her children so she was delighted to help! I get all emotional just thinking about it.

And that brings me to another point: I must confess I’m not certain that it’s a totally helpful thing to have such a large number of infertility stories available! Most of them seem to be success stories only, which might encourage you, but they can also just make you more miserable. I think it’s best to find a balance between real-life counseling and sharing infertility stories on the World Wide Web. You could give the reason that there aren’t any infertility support groups in your neighborhood, but have you considered creating one? You might be able to lend a hand to many other couples enduring a similar experience. You could already be familiar with other couples who are struggling, but maybe you can put up some posters at the local GP’s rooms. You don’t need to be a qualified therapist; all you need is an ear and a shoulder – a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen, and possibly a teapot too.

It is crucial to have the chance to to relate your infertility stories, and to hear the stories of other couples too. It might make the situation easier to cope with knowing that you are not alone in your struggles so try to get a group in your district, or consider starting one yourself.

Here is more information on [1] Infertility Stress. Here is a website with a free mini-course dedicated to [2] Infertility.